Operation: Rogue Gypsy

with Donnie K.

Cricut Gypsy
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Yeah I Blog

29 Jul 2009

Breaking down a door

A lot of people have been impressed by my brute strength in breaking that door down when I was going after Amy. To give a hand to the other, less experienced bounty hunters out there, I’m going to give a tutorial. This has come in handy more than a few times for me.1. Take a stiff drink of something. If water is all you’ve got, that’s fine too. Good hydration is key to doorframe breaking.2. Be sure to exhale right when you hit the door. I’m not sure what this does, but I’ve seen my hero, Chuck Norris, do it so there’s gotta be something to it.3. Do a sidekick with your foot, contacting the door right below the doorknob. Using your shoulder is not advisable; I just did it for show.(Note, a back kick or a front push kick works too. A flying roundhouse, not so much.)

28 Jul 2009

Luck Be a Crafter Lady

I’ve got this lucky fishing lure; I take it with me on every job and it’s never failed me yet. It’s been my good luck charm to bring in some of the toughest suspects. I’ve got it hanging from my rearview mirror so it can send out its vibe and get the cosmos working for me. And, up until now, it’s worked like a champ. I mean, it’s been better than a rabbit’s foot that has a four-leaf clover clutched between its claws. But I guess you could say it hasn’t been too lucky lately. Maybe its aura is losing potency, so that it only works on other aquatic creatures. Then again, it should have at least warned me that Amy was gonna jump into a dang pool, trying to get away from me.

28 Jul 2009

Top 10 Inventions

I’m man enough to admit when I’m wrong. I was behind Provo Craft when they wanted me to get these Gypsies back. But to be honest, I really didn’t understand how cool these things were. Now that I’ve seen first hand the extremes ladies will go to keep them and witnessed with my own two eyes what they are actually capable of, I’ve gone ahead and put the Gypsy on my list of best inventions ever. It was a tough decision, but television got bumped out of the Top Ten. Here’s what we’ve got now: 
10. Energy Drinks
9. Mixed Martial Arts
8. T-Bone Steaks
7. Futons
6. Skulls, and skull-related paraphernalia
5. Monster Trucks
4. Lightning
3. Gravy
2. The Gypsy
1. Bite-sized pizza pockets

My Mission

Provo Craft sent out 13 of their new Gypsy devices to be tested by crafters across the country. Only 3 were returned. This is the story of the other 10.

Mission Deadline

Read My Tweets

Rogue Gypsies It’s official – I quit. Or, I was fired. Either way, I’m done. It’s not all bad though... watch! http://tinyurl.com/mhos7j about 912 days ago from web

I think I’d make a decent assassin. Or a botanist, now that I can tell the difference between regular ivy and the itchy kind. about 912 days ago from web

I’m about ready to give up. Does anybody know any good temp agencies in Texas? about 912 days ago from web